Organised Networking Sucks Big Time, Here's Why I think So
I had a meeting with a web designer friend of mine recently and we got talking about business. How's business with you, are you keeping busy etc etc… all that kind of usual stuff
He told me the majority of his work comes via other club members (We're in the same sports club together), and that got me thinking….
Of course it does!
Maurice contributes buckets of time to kids in the club, organising matches, training, events, coaches etc etc. He gives lots of his time to the kids purely because he wants to. No agenda. And he gets back that time in business offered to him.
The other night I read a post on Google Small Business Community in G+ that prompted me to record the above video and write this article.
It asked; What's the best way to generate lead?
The Best Way To Generate Leads For Your Business
After considering the question and given that it's a broad one, Maurice the web designer came to mind and the answer to this question did too.
I have found that sustainable and worthwhile business comes about all on its own. It's done by forming real relationships in honest and non business environments.
Business comes about best organically, by virtue of forming relationships through a mutual unrelated interest in your community. This has been my experience.
The best work that ever came my way was through relationships I had formed in a social environment. Drinking pints in the bar, meeting friends, playing football and making a contribution without agenda. Not in a sterile business environment.
Organised business networking groups and organisations such as BNI can offer value, and some good relationships can be formed in that sphere but it's an exception rather than the norm.
The strongest and most valuable relationships come about by virtue of a common interest away from the agenda of making sales.
I would suggest that any lasting relationships you have formed from an initial meeting in a structured business networking environment, came about because you connected on some emotional level.
Organised Networking sterilises the relationship forming process, and when everyone enters the room trying to sell their shit, then nobody buys.
Organisations such as BNI attempt to take what should happen organically in the real world and put it in a box with rules. That just will never work for me…
I'm not good with other people's rules.
Organised Networking ∝ Unsubstantial Relationships
I have very few lasting relationship with the people I met during my time in BNI. In fact when I decided I should move on, one of the members told me he couldn't refer me any longer.
That pretty much sealed it right there. As far as that guy and most others in BNI at that time were concerned, their relationships were only worthwhile if you've paid your fee and sit at the table.
Bullshit, I'm outta here!
Some of you might disagree with me, and that's fine. But as far as I am concerned, real relationships are made first and subsequent business done without an agenda.
You do business with me because you like being around me, you can trust me, we have a deeper connection. And I do business with you because I like being around you and because I trust you. If organised networking can be a facility to nurture that for you then fine, I happen to believe they do the opposite.
Just Forget About It
So, to build your business and generate leads, just forget about it. Forget about trying to coerce, convince, and persuade others that you're good for the. Show them the real you instead.
Join a local community venture, a club, and residents association, or a volunteer organisation. Focused with others on a common goal that supports your values and leave all other agendas at home.
Rather than wasting your time pretending to be interested is some douche you just met, and he pretending to be interested in you'll making a positive difference in the lives of others.
Thanks for your article. I attended a BNI meeting yesterday. After thinking about it for 24 hours, I have a few questions for my sponsor:
1. Now that you all know each other, why do you need BNI to “supervise” your meetings? Why not meet outside BNI and do business with each other without the $700 overhead?
2. If we had talked outside BNI (which we did) and you found out I performed a service you needed, would you do business with me regardless of whether I was a BNI member (provided you liked my work)? If you liked my work and wanted to do business with me, would a requirement for that be that I have to join your BNI group?
3. How much outside business do you get from clients other than BNI members?
4. Now that you and your members know I am a graphic designer, is the only thing that prevents you from doing business with me the fact that I am not a BNI member? What if someone in the group needs my services? Are they discouraged from using me simply because I have attended a meeting and may have decided not to join the group?
5. Suppose I become a member and a plumber also joins (a profession discussed as a possible need for your group). I use an excellent plumber that I fully trust and would highly recommend. If I do not care for the BNI plumber as much as my friend, am I discouraged from using my friend now that I have my own BNI plumber? What if I use my friend and the BNI plumber finds out? Will he not be upset I was not “faithful” to our group? Shouldn’t I, supposing I am an excellent designer, not be free to do business with whomever wants to pay for my services regardless of which BNI group I attend? This feels somewhat like how a union operates. Annual dues, only 1 member per occupation, no outside competition. Sounds very much like a clique.
6. If I join your BNI group as a graphic designer and my work is inferior to the designer in another group, are my group members “forced” to continue to utilize my services even though I may do less-than-stellar work?
7. If my services are worthy of your time and money, why do I need to be a BNI member to gain your trust and business? Is the print company you use a member of your group? Would you still use them if they rejected becoming a BNI Member?
8. How does BNI benefit me more than the Chamber of Commerce BRAG groups? Their annual costs are around half what BNI’s is and their business concept seems to be nearly identical (exclusive groups with only 1 person/profession, weekly meetings in an identical format, annual dues – $289 for Chamber membership).
9. With the internet now a worldwide phenomenon, my services are much better suited for a broader clientele. It seems that BNI is geared more towards locally owned businesses that focus on clients in the immediate vicinity. I am not truly sure how much work a graphic designer can gain from only 30 small business owners on a regular basis. Now that you have seen my work, am I worthy of your business? Would you use me had I never come to a BNI meeting? If not, why?
Sounds like you have already made up your mind. BNI is a false environment in which I was never comfortable. Everyone has themselves fooled that they are doing something positive for their business from their BNI membership, when in fact they are merely wasting their money and lining the pockets of BNI. Go join a soccer club or a GAA club and become an active member. You’ll make more solid contacts doing so. Your business relationships formed inside BNI will not be substantial, IMO, and will not last outside BNI. Maybe some will, but that will be the exception, not the norm. I was in BNI for 4 or 5 years and my opinion is that it, and other organised networking groups, are largely bullshit.