How To Develop Substantial Testicular Fortitude
In today's article I'm taking a look at testicular fortitude; that element of mental power that allows us face down our most significant challenges and win. Problems come, and problems go, and the level of testicular fortitude we bring to the fight will largely determine the outcome. Winning is not winning per se. Instead, it is coming out the other side of experience better equipped than we were before. Although there may be material loss or loss of self-confidence, ultimately there is only gain. The most fundamental factor that will influence that outcome is our perception. Testicular fortitude is about resilience, grit, intrinsic motivation and commitment.
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If there is one thing that is certain in this world, it is that things change. Change is inevitable – It is the nature of life and that of which we are made.
We can't stop change, so we either develop the resilience to withstand and manage it, or we crumble under it.
But many of us live as if life owes us a smooth ride, or maybe a softer ride than we are currently on. We want to seek out others that we can hold accountable for our circumstances.
We fail to appreciate the most critical factor in why we experience what we experience.
Us. You. Me. Ourselves.
It is you who creates your experience and me, mine, by our focus and attention to things, mostly things we don't like.
The lack, therefore, of our ability to first accept that we made things how they are, and then to apply the necessary testicular fortitude to process and deal with the event, amplifies the pain.
Lack of testicular fortitude is a weakness, lack of resilience, and an over-reliance on others.
And when the ones we rely on don't swoop in to support us, we crumble.
Some of us never recover.
We become caught in an echo chamber of our self-pity.
7 Ways To Develop Testicular Fortitude
Developing testicular fortitude, or strength, courage and resilience may not come easy, especially if you've spent your entire life believing that other people are to blame for your problems.
The good news is that you can change it.
The bad news is it will take tremendous effort, and you will need to get comfortable being uncomfortable for a while.
As William James said in his 1914 posthumous work titled, Habit;
Every good that is worth possessing must be paid form in strokes of daily effort
In other words, you've got to put the work in if you want to change or create something. There's just no way around it.
Here's how you can start;
#1 Put Yourself Out There
Start something new like a hobby you've always put off, or learn a language or start a business around a passion. There are no greater means of enhancing your knowledge of a subject and confidence in yourself than to set a goal and achieve it. Take a course that challenges you in the area you're weakest. Take on extra responsibility in your local club. Do something that exposes and challenges you and move through it.
#2 Have A Cold Shower
Cold showers can be brutal, especially in winter. Most people would rather stink than have a cold shower, and you know, it's a reflection of our reliance on modern conveniences – they make us weak and ill-prepared. To expose ourselves to things that are uncomfortable makes us stronger. So take on a cold shower once per day, you'll be surprised after just a short period just how much your testicular fortitude will grow.
#3 Speak Affirmations To Yourself
The effects of positive psychology on human behaviour is well documented. Repeating affirmative statements to ourselves throughout the day which are related to our goals, trains our minds to stay on track. However, they won't work if we are not in a good place. In fact, they may only serve to worsen our already difficult position. So first we need to diffuse the difficulty and that's where #4 on the list comes in.
#4 Meditate
Our modern society runs on the speed and availability of information. There's so much of it, so many people vying for our attention it can become overwhelming. The amygdala or emotional brain, is always on and so we must find a way to switch it off. Meditation techniques are that off switch. Meditation calms the frantic mind and opens up the learning and memory centres of the brain allowing new helpful information take hold.
#5 Talk To Yourself In The Mirror
When we're in a good place, taking the opportunity to face and talk to ourselves in the mirror can take the positive affirming practice to another level. There's nowhere to hide in this; it's just you and you. Take the opportunity to address the lies you have been telling yourself, then tell yourself who you truly are. Don't be surprised if you become emotional under these circumstances as the experience can be quite profound.
#6 Look For The Positive
Like each of the other six suggestions, looking for the positive in difficult everyday circumstances can be very difficult especially when your brain has been trained to react emotionally. However, if you practice the daily routine of meditation and affirmation then finding the positive in difficult circumstances and people will come easier. You come to recognise the negative when it arrives because it makes you feel shitty. Then flip the thought.
#7 Get A Coach
If practising the above daily is too challenging then maybe you need to employ a coach to assist you. Having the support of someone who has been down the difficult road or perhaps treats others in a professional capacity, can be hugely beneficial.
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Retrain Your Brain
You may have spent a lifetime reacting automatically to circumstances and events, so retraining your brain will take time.
You may fall off the horse several times, but remember that's not a failure, it's just part of the process.
Building mental resolve required switching off the stimulants that have been active, and there's no way around it – you've simply got to be determined.
Otherwise, a goal set or a dream dreamt will never see the light of day.
Testicular fortitude is a bit of a play on what is for many a serious matter, and I don't mean to belittle for what to many people is a serious issue.
However, if you've made it this far into the article then it has had the desired effect.
If there were only one thing that you can do from the above seven points, I'd suggest you take #4 Meditation as that one thing.
On its own, it can help you achieve more than anything else you can do. It is, in essence, achieving everything by doing nothing.
Reader Download: Grab yourself a FREE copy of the 7 Ways To Develop Mental Strength one-page PDF. Pin it to the wall behind your computer as a reminder.
Chip says
I have looked in the mirror. I started doing so about thirty years ago as part of my quitting use of alcohol. I also tried to quit complaining and seek positive words in gesture of moral support of others although raised with harsh criticism without being led with personal dignity of being myself. I was expected to wear a suit & tie. So many simply grow to reject the hypocrisy of ways of parents who were never given the same
Vanessa says
Testicular fortitude! Wow, I feel empowered just by saying these two words, they carry such an energy, even though I feel there should be a gender-neutral version of this expression.
Thank you for sharing these tips, I will definitely resume my morning cold showers and practice the other ones.
May I suggest another tip: lightening up & stop taking everything so seriously
Keep up the good work, I’ve been binge-reading your articles today and loved it!
larrym says
“…stop taking everything so seriously” I like it! And yes, will need to find a more gender friendly analogy for this idea. Thanks for reading Vanessa!